My life is changing. I’m focused on photography. I’m also glancing about at other true relaxation. Don’t worry my passion for quality music, film and television has not wavered. I won’t be sure how much is going to change – but this change is changing me at so many levels.
A lot of my past dabbles into serious distraction have flowed on by. A little like a trusted pushbike left in the backyard, slowly rusting, fading and joining the garden in unintended ways. Writing has been left behind lately – well my kind of writing that is. I call it writing, which might be a tad presumptuous of course, but placing words in front of others can only be described as writing. My audience for this outpouring is very limited, one day my wings will spread and I’ll get more than a few to read it. At the moment I admit that some folks need serious prompting to read it. Some even need financial inducement.
But dear reader if you’re here now, you must be reading this. You could have just scanned and spotted this bit of course and I do the same. Speed read, scan, overview a body of text and grab the interesting bits – interesting to me you’d understand. That particular bit may bore the crap out of you, and although I may not have read your writing yet … I’ll be onto it soon.
What I am going to do first is find out how I can chastise the shitty, noisy, disrespectful, socially challenged kids that seem to congregate around my bedroom, computer, office room. They delight in screaming and a bankable fact – 2 minutes into the activity burst into tears (every fucking day), throw things, slam doors, ignore their parents. What I’m reliably informed is normal child behaviour. I don’t have children, you can possibly tell from my observation of their playful get togethers. Fucking hell, have I a city wide day care centre for rotten cumquats operating next door.
Sorry, well back to the changes I’m seeking. I can’t remember when this aim to change occurred, but if I could be truthful – I’d be in so much trouble. A life changing event slides ever so slowly into my world and so now after much deep thought … Damn – not possible today, those fucking children are getting larger in numbers and louder in their chaos.
Any-who the thoughts are getting deeper and the outcome completely unknown.
With all aspects of my life, I do overthink things and this, more than not so, results in deep conversations with myself and my cigarettes. The dogs even get a look in and a chat or two, although they’ve been outside barking at the local neighbourhood shits. The shits have teased both dogs over the fence over a year or two and despite my warnings, and scary discussions, continue to risk doing so. If one ends up in my yard or pops a tender juicy pink hand through the gate or fence it will be most gruesome. This non approved surgery will result in much volatile talk and sadly for the dog involved – euthanasia. The handless shit and his or her comrades will remember not to tease dogs in future.
Well – back to me. What is happening and how will I react to it.
Oh great – dinner’s ready next door, so some of the shits are leaving- not all though, the dinner-less triplets are roaming free of food and parents supervision apparently. Their is some music and an adult voice in the background adding spice to their behaviour but is not involved in improving the dinner. He or she remains outside and is free reigning the nightmare that is my Sunday afternoon peace.
Fuck this, I give up – I’m off to have a cigarette, talk to the dogs, think about things and consider the things I’m thinking about. More later me thinks – change is a happening.
Oh and if my various child owning neighbours read this I’d say I’m in for some terse talk.